Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Things Republicans Believe

Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

Government should relax regulation of Big Business and Big Money but crack down on individuals who use marijuana to relieve the pain of illness.

"Standing Tall for America" means firing your workers and moving their jobs to India.

A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

Group sex and drug use are degenerate sins unless you someday run for governor of California as a Republican.

If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

HMOs and insurance companies have the interest of the public at heart.

Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.

You support states' rights, which means Attorney General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have a right to adopt.

What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

Some of these are a bit dated, but I still found this amusing! If you want to read a good article which is anything but amusing, check out the latest issue of Rolling Stone. Their article on why "Congress Must Go Now", will amaze and appall you!


Blogger el said...

I would respond to all of them, but I don't really have the time or the energy during the week. Maybe I work too much, but that isn't the point. The last one on Cuba is what I want to address. I have to admit this is a stupid one thanks to the Cubans in Miami. I'm not too worried about writing this because they don't speak english anyway (have you been to Miami?). They are all republican in name only. The main reason is because Kennedy (Bay of Pigs)was a democrat and they hold alot of sway because of being a bulk voting group in a swing state. It is one of those things that is republican because of thier voting power, but if you asked most republicans their opinion they probubly would be confused as well. That is unless they know Miami. But put that against most other issues, and the republicans still win my vote. I wish I could go on and on, but that is it for me now.

10/25/2006 8:09 PM  
Blogger Leo said...

El, I have been to Miami, but I haven't spent much time there. It doesn't sound like you care for it much. Anyway, I'm just ecstatic you agree with me on something!!--lol Thanks for stopping by and for the comments.

10/25/2006 11:21 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home

eXTReMe Tracker